Remember, too, that defensive people often expect others to react the way they do. So a defensive manager giving you feedback may be braced for warfare, but you can change the dynamic by using responses that emphasize your openness to the feedback. Saying something like, “I’m really glad you’re telling me this. I didn’t realize that this has been an issue, and grateful to know” can dramatically change the nature of the interaction.Learn better ways to work
But there’s a secret to defusing defensiveness. It might not be your first instinct, and you might not be thrilled with what it takes, but it work.
You might get backed up on your heels with someone who has a reason or explanation for everything. As Castelda describes, “The defensive person is like Teflon — it’s never his responsibility and he attempts to shift the ownership of blame on someone else.” Sound preparation won’t stop other person from reacting negatively, but it can help you to respond calmly and effectively when the emotions arise.
The crying reaction can make it easy for you to get flustered. Remember that you are not trying to be mean, rather help them be more successful. Stay focused on delivering the core – the message is the message! Below are some tips to navigate feedback with a more sensitive employee:Below are some tips to help when interacting with a defensive person: